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Blog / News
The New York Lie
April 19, 2026
Where’s the soul I wanna know? New York City’s evil The surface is everything but I could never do that Someone would see through that — Motorcycle Drive By, Third Eye Blind The flowers are begging you to come outside. All colorful and shit. Bopping in the wind as if they are dancing, celebrating pure
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The Wavering Mind And Chasing Butterflies
April 12, 2026
“Que será, será Whatever will be, will be The future’s not ours to see Que será, será What will be, will be” One of the favorite slang words of the youth is being “cooked,” which refers to being defeated, finished, exhausted or in trouble. My version of this, for years, has been, “it’s over.” In
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Cheek to Cheek
April 3, 2026
“Do you want to know something people don’t know?” The quizzical almost five year old asks me in his high pitched but somewhat nasally voice. “Sure,” I respond. “Under the crust of the Earth there is lava.” “If people don’t know that, then how to do you know that.” He thinks for a minute. He’s
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When Being Young Meant Letting Go
March 24, 2026
As I write this, I sit in an airport with a large bloody Mary, so take whatever I write with a shot of your favorite spirit. And as a disclaimer, I don’t think children should be drinking alcohol, but I think in order to save the youth, they need to start drinking again. It is
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The Astronaut Suffers
March 21, 2026
Few things fascinate me more than the cosmos. Space, in its infinite wonders, is only matched by mystery to humanity by the deep blue sea. Personally, I like the fact that there are still mysteries to us. As astrophysicist Neil deGrasse Tyson says, “the universe is under no obligation to make sense to you.” History,
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Conan O’Brien Audience Story
March 14, 2026
Conan O’Brien is one of my idols and top comedic influences. He’s a legend and one of the best to ever do it. I grew up worshiping Conan, as he is a master of walking the line between smart and silly, which he makes look easy and it really is not an easy thing to
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Distraction. Distraction. Distraction.
March 6, 2026
Like almost everybody, I spend far too much time on the internet. It’s hard not to, especially in the winter when we are stuck indoors. In a recent internet conspiracy around whether or not Jim Carrey was cloned or sends a body double in his place (I think it’s very possible Jim has a body
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When The Body Sleeps
March 2, 2026
Chapter One. Quinn Harting was a normal boy who likes dinosaurs and superheroes. He was frightened of the dark, a quality his father thought was sign of weakness, completely forgetting his own fear of the dark when he was small, clinging to his mother’s leg. So the irony was completely lost on Quinn’s father when
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Boys Chase Girls
February 18, 2026
It is legitimately crazy for humans as a species to act like there isn’t an innate difference between boys and girls. Yes, there are outliers and exceptions, but for the masses, gender is not a social construct. There are things innately different about boys and girls and anyone who has worked with young children or
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On the 7th Day, You’ll Breathe Again (Like Never Before)
February 14, 2026
No one goes into an elective surgery without some sort of promise. It wouldn’t be the first time I elected for surgery (a tonsillectomy which literally almost killed me, as I hemorrhaged blood enough blood post surgery to land me back into the hospital in need of a double blood transfusion), and if I lived
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