When Being Young Meant Letting Go

• Lori Palminteri
• Uncategorized
• March 24, 2026

As I write this, I sit in an airport with a large bloody Mary, so take whatever I write with a shot of your favorite spirit. And as a disclaimer, I don’t think children should be drinking alcohol, but I think in order to save the youth, they need to start drinking again.

It is crazy to me the drinking age is 21 when you can die for your country at 18. If it were up to me, the drinking age and voting age would be swapped. Because let’s face it, most of us drank as teenagers and most of us had a great time doing it, and it didn’t ruin our lives. It might not be a popular opinion, but I encourage teenagers to drink (18 and over, but also 17 and even 16 if no one in your family has a drinking problem).

In high school, my friends drank before I did. I was relatively against drinking at a young age. But I was allowed to have wine with dinner with my family, and truthfully, I first started getting drunk with my older cousins before inevitably partying with my friends sometime after my sixteenth birthday.

I’m not going to say we weren’t idiots. Because often times we were. I never threw a house party because I feared the repercussions. But we were respectful of our parent’s properties, even if we broke the rules. House parties consisted of a lot drinking, beer pong, dancing on counters, someone throwing up in the bathroom or on the lawn, various hook ups (I rarely hooked up in High School, I didn’t drink to get laid, I drank to party), and concluded with the potheads smoking a blunt before passing out on the couch. Those who passed out with shoes on were subjected to sharpie drawings on their face. If you passed out without your shoes on, it was forbidden to draw on them.

In the morning, all of us hungover, we would tackle cleaning the house in a team effort. Though, smoking weed brought out my OCD and my friends would purposely get me high because then I’d grab a garbage bag and start cleaning the house. We must of done a decent job cleaning, because we got away with parties more than we were caught.

I graduated High School in 2007, so this was a time where we had cell phones but before smartphones. Picture evidence of our shenanigans is rare and usually taken on a disposable camera. I hear that the younger generation doesn’t drink as much and there is no dancing at their parties. What a bore! They are missing out on some really fun times that cannot be replicated when you are older.

Think about it. You have your whole future. You’re with all your friends. You have little responsibility. Your body is pretty good at recovering from alcohol (any young readers, take advantage of drinking because after 30, hangovers are rough and they get rougher). You’re blasting music all your friends like. Playing games. Laughing. This is one the best parts of being a angsty teenager in the suburbs: legendary house parties.

I’m not discouraging a focus on academia. I was a good student and lots of my friends were smarter than me and perpetual honors students. That didn’t mean we didn’t know how to let loose. In fact, we needed to let loose. People forget how harrowing High School and College can be. You’re loaded with hormones, social pressure, family pressure, future fears, new loves and first heartbreaks. I would argue that our weekend warrior ways made us better students, because like everyone, we needed a break.

Imagine thinking teenagers were up to no good with beer and then this is literally us…

The biggest fear then, and now, is drunk driving. The kids whose parents were the most strict about drinking were the kids who drove drunk or got in cars with drunk drivers because they “had to get home.” I was able to call my Mom if I was drinking and there wasn’t a safe way home without getting in trouble. I didn’t make a habit out of it, but I was never berated or punished for calling home late at night drunk because I needed a ride. These days it’s even easier with Uber.

It makes me happy we didn’t have smart phones back then. Because there would be too many damning pictures. I’d tell the youth to throw parties where everyone has to confiscate their phone so they can know what it’s like to live in the moment. What a goddamn gift. To not worry about anything, playing drinking game and having a blast with your goofy friends. I’m still friends with all those people and we still party, but not quite like we used to. Partly because half of the group has kids, and partly because drinking to excess takes too much a toll on our now aging bodies.

I don’t think a parent should buy their under-aged kids booze, but I don’t think it should be shamed either (unless they’re being insanely reckless). The youth today is looking at a country in deep trouble. They are feeling the weight of a dystopian future. Will America still be America? Will ai take the jobs we want? Will they ever be able to afford homes to raise families? I have no answers to those questions. The future frightens me too. All the more reason to take advantage of the present. To have fun for a little while. Your adulthood will be relentless and often a chore. Plan for it, but be young. Make mistakes. Get drunk and kiss the girl or boy. Dance on a table.

My biggest regret in my life is all the times I worried for no reason. I still struggle with this. Take your mind off of it. Drink for fun, not to repress something. I encourage the youth to be foolish and take risks. It’s your time.

“Clean up your head, clean up your heart
Clean up your bedroom, clean up your car
Clean up your head, clean up your heart

Clean up your heart
You’re missing the best part”

“STUCK IN MY HEAD” — Arcade Fire