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Blue Christmas
December 24, 2016
Christmas time is a dark time of year. I mean that literally. It’s the darkest time of the year. The days are short. You barely see sunlight because you’re stuck in an office during the day, thinking about the past year, questioning all your life decisions, inviting regret and guilt into your psyche as you
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Vienna
December 18, 2016
“Can you stop that?” a crotchety old woman seated in front of us yelled at my over zealous best friend for cheering too enthusiastically at the Billy Joel concert. In her defense, we were properly liquored up, and being very loud. In our defense, we weren’t the only drunk and loud people in Madison Square
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Kill! Fuck! Marry! WESTWORLD Edition
December 11, 2016
Ah, yes, it’s every one’s favorite “passing the time on this long ass car ride” game. This is the Westworld edition. Warning! Spoilers! After watching the season finale last week, I stayed up till nearly 3am just thinking, and reading a book, to keep my mind from thinking. Goddamnit, the Westworld series finale is one
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Dependent
December 4, 2016
Whenever a friend, or stranger, has told me they’re on medication for depression, I have never judged them. The opposite is true, actually. Their decision to get a grip on the darkness that comes with depression is admirable. And yet, the idea of ME taking medication for depression was out the question. See, I’m the
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The Facebook Lie
November 27, 2016
This is a conversation I hear all the time. A conversation I’ve both been a part of and observed. A conversation that lifts the veil of Facebook: “I’m/he/she isn’t really doing well at all.” “You/he/she seems like they’re killing it on Facebook.” “Yeah, well, that’s Facebook.” As a comic, Facebook is a promotional tool. So
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Job Opportunity
November 19, 2016
Anyone who knows me very well knows, I’m almost always on the verge of quitting comedy (particularly this year) and running off to an island, teaching English to impoverished kids or something like that. Whether or not these are empty threats depends entirely on which version of me you’re talking to. I’m not alone in
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What You Wish For
November 14, 2016
I didn’t want to write a blog this week. Ipso facto, why this one is a bit tardy. I didn’t want to write about how I didn’t vote, because I’m as cynical as one can get about the political game. I didn’t want to defend my decision not to partake in an election I regard
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Teddy
November 5, 2016
Teddy was a hamster. But Teddy was also a lot more than a mere adorable rodent. Teddy was a class pet in my third grade class. Every week, there was a lottery to determine who got to take Teddy home for the weekend. My family never really had pets growing up. We never had a
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AKA DEATH
October 29, 2016
After a near death experience, slacker Andi makes a deal with Death to continue living. AKA DEATH: PILOT
Getting High In Cars With Boys
October 22, 2016
My late teens could best be defined driving aimlessly, smoking blunts around Long Island. This was wasted time I’ll never see as wasted. While a lot of it is wash in my memory (alas, I was high), some of the most important conversations of my life happened in the cars of my best boys, getting
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