Boys Chase Girls

• Lori Palminteri
• Uncategorized
• February 18, 2026

It is legitimately crazy for humans as a species to act like there isn’t an innate difference between boys and girls. Yes, there are outliers and exceptions, but for the masses, gender is not a social construct. There are things innately different about boys and girls and anyone who has worked with young children or old people will tell you. Little boys, before they can talk, weaponize toys, whereas little girls nurture baby dolls.

Additionally, when I worked in the nursing home, there was a huge difference between how male patients acted when they lost it and how women acted. Most of the nursing home residents were female, because women live longer. As a male’s mental health declines, they turn into monkeys— jerking off their dick and trying to grab women’s asses and boobs. I saw this frequently, and narrowly escaped getting my ass grabbed on more than one occasion. Meanwhile, the female Alzheimer’s patients walked around with baby dolls, like a small child, and attended to the baby like it was alive.

We’re different before we know why our parts are different, and we’re different when we lose ourselves with age— and so, we are different in the stages in between.

Respectfully, trans-women are women but they are still different than a biological woman. Unlike most people who argue about this, I actually have trans friends (who agree that government shouldn’t pay for surgery and kids should not be on puberty blockers, and that the trans movement has actually hurt trans people). I have a joke, that is rooted in truth (why it’s funny) that a trans woman is a real woman because women hate their bodies and if you hate your body enough to change your gender, that makes you a woman. It is not transphobic to say trans women are different than biological women. It is a simple fact. And being different isn’t a bad thing. It is our unique traits that make us more interesting characters in this life.

[Side rant: The bathrooms does become a legitimate issue and concern. Because I would have no problem sharing a bathroom with a legitimate trans woman. The issue is that all men are perverts, and though being a pervert in itself isn’t a crime (nor should it necessarily shamed), being a predatory pervert is a problem, and what’s stopping nefarious men from wearing a dress and claiming to be trans and hanging out in women’s bathroom. JK Rowling fights for this, and is wrongfully accused of hating trans people. She is fighting for women. One time, me and this other girl had to have a man thrown out of gym for sneaking into the women’s locker room. This shit is common. Women spaces do need to be protected.]

All that aside and acknowledged, I’ll go forward speaking more broadly about boys and girls, and the natural order of things. Women are a better species than men. We are. Women are born with empathy, men have to learn it from their family. And quite frequently, even boys with loving families don’t become empathetic people. Women are fucking crazy, because our hormones are wild, but men are animals that would mostly be happy fucking and living in a cave, as long as they were able to fuck regularly. If you’re lucky like me, you had a Dad who was actually invested in being a Dad and loved spending time with his kids. Most men are genetically engineered to donate their sperm and not care to be nurturing in any way (this is the actual whole theme of the book, “Frankenstein”). I’ve known good men to confess that they while they love their kids, they preferred their lives when they were childless.

Because men are so cold, they expect women to not be. Women are expected to be warm and welcoming, but not sleeping around for fun. We’re expected to fulfill men in all the ways they fall short of being a human because deep down men just want to be kung fu fighting. I don’t say this as a man hater. I’m a guys gal! I get along better with men because I find women to be very dramatic. But my point is this… men and women do balance each other. It is idiotic, if not dangerous, to upset the natural order of things.

Now, I could be considered a modern woman— a new age bohemian, if you will. I have lived alone for over a decade now, fiercely independent. I have a lot of male qualities, actually. No one would consider me a normal girl. Comics are naturally perverted. And I don’t mean purely in a sexual way. We overshare, we’re curious, we interested in truths we can turn into half truths as jokes. For years, not only did I split bills on dates, but I insisted. Especially when I was broke! I’ve asked guys out on the subway. I’ve asked out a lot of guys, actually, and have been turned down. Every. Single. Time. Yup, my track record for being the initiator is 100% failure. This is why, at 36, I refuse to ask a guy out. If you want me, you’re going to have to do the chasing a little. Not because I love to be chased. Because men need to be the ones to do it. Natural order.

I’ve wasted too much time thinking I’d be so charming, funny, lovable, sexy that a guy who I was pursuing would fall madly in love with me. Nope. It never works. Men lose interest when you’re too interested. This is what life has taught me first hand.

There are some gentlemen left, but they tend to be older guys. Younger guys are wildly immature and often looking for a caretaker to fill them up. They’re also always looking for the next, better thing. And with dating apps, both men and women have gotten more socially retarded, and I say this as someone who’s best friends say I’m socially awkward as fuck.

I’d like to cover some etiquette (mostly for men, but I guess women too) for asking out someone via social media. First of all, you’re allowed! I’ve gone on dates with people who have asked! This is very important, if you’re going to slide into a girl’s dm’s on social media and try to court her, it helps if your profile picture is of you and not, say, a car or dog. This has happened to me SO MANY times. Guys will message me and their profiles will lack a single picture of them. We need a picture. Not just for vanity reasons, but for safety reason. Who the fuck are you? With a car profile picture? If you’re dm’ing an attractive girl, know that she probably gets this often, and she’s weary. If you send multiple messages, you start to look like a psycho. And if you send multiple messages and then the next week write something like, “fine, I guess you’re too good to talk to me,” or something passive aggressive, you have just confirmed that YOU ARE A PSYCHO. Also, if the girl declines, she owes you no explanation. If you reply accusing the girl of being shallow, you have also just proved how unworthy you are to even TALK to women. I’ve had guys I never met, with no picture of themselves on their profiles accuse me of being shallow. Like bro, you’re only messaging me because YOU ARE SHALLOW. You think I’m hot. You know nothing about me. If I was 250lbs and had buck teeth, you would NEVER try to get me to go out with you. Fuck off.

There are a million reasons why a woman might turn you down (most of them don’t even have to do with you, take your rejection on the chin like a man). That doesn’t mean you shouldn’t ask or try. But don’t harass a woman or gaslight them. Some of the biggest red flags to me is when a man says he’s a feminist or “I’m a really nice guy, that’s why women don’t date me.” That isn’t why. I will tell you the real reason, if you want to hear it. Don’t look for validation from me. I can be a real cold hard bitch when I suspect a bull shitter in my presence.

The truth is, even my lesbian man hating friends don’t bash men as much as other men. My dad, uncles, male friends… they have all been telling me my whole life how awful men are and how I should not trust them. I know there are good guys out there. I’m friends with them, I’ve worked with them. Most guys are assholes till about their mid 30s, and then they improve. Most guys over 40 will tell you themselves how awful they were in their younger years. It takes men decades to mature. Of course there are immature women, but generally, we are waiting for you to catch up to us.

Men either worship women or see them as servants. You don’t want to be stuck with the guy who wants you as his sex pet AND his mother. There’s issues with the guys who worship women as well. Because we are humans, and they expect us to be more, to be better than them. So they are let down by a woman who doesn’t fit their idea of what a woman deity is supposed to be.

Look, if it was easy to find the right partner, I wouldn’t be sitting alone in my apartment writing this. Partner is the key word there. Someone who isn’t going to belittle or control you nor expects you to be a goddess. The moon to your sun, or visa versa. If I could, I would tell a younger Lori to never bother chasing a man. He’ll be happy to lose you, every time. And so I wait, not in an ivory tower, but a dated studio apartment, not for a prince, but for a proper gentleman, who admires women but is not afraid of them, knowing damn well, men aren’t made that now these days, if they ever were.