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Wonderful Tonight
June 22, 2015
A phone call from a lawyer whom I’ve never met stirred memories which have been left by the wayside in my brain. I received a small amount of money in a settlement against the Venetian Yacht Club, because they didn’t fairly compensate their employees (where I worked as a caterer for two years). While I
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12 Songs I Never Get Sick Of
June 14, 2015
12. In My Life – The Beatles “Though I know I’ll never lose affection For people and things that went before I know I’ll often stop and think about them In my life I love you more.” No other song makes me feel both a little forlornness with happiness, simultaneously, every single time I listen
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93 Miles
June 7, 2015
I guess it’s best to start at the beginning. It may help you understand. It may help to know I tend to be manic, and I get into these bizarre but familiar funks where I start to lose my shit. Basically, you have rational thoughts, and irrational thoughts. Everyone does. If you’re remotely intelligent, you
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Girl Walks Into A Bar
May 31, 2015
Girl walks into a bar, alone. It’s a Friday. The smell of a joint lingers in her hair. She came to this particular bar for two reasons: it was close to home, and they were showing the Ranger game on a large projector screen. The place is not big. Most the seats are taken. Even
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Q&A
May 24, 2015
Where was your first performance on stage, and how did it go? Do you remember the first joke you told to an audience? (Dough H.) My first stand-up performance was a bringer show (a new talent show where you have to bring x amount of people for x amount of stage time, for those not
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Older
May 17, 2015
When I was a young girl, I wanted to be older. Most kids want to be older, but only by a couple years. I wanted to be an adult. Adults seemed so smart to me back then. My parents, aunts, and uncles will attest, I was an extremely mature child, making me odd, but pleasant.
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Opia
May 10, 2015
Everyone has regrets. Anyone who tells you otherwise is either lying to you or lying to themselves. It’s impossible to live a life without regrets. I declare that if you don’t have any regrets, you’re doing life wrong. Regrets. I have a few. I have some that changed my whole life. Some I haven’t told
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Grim Readers
May 4, 2015
Last year, my best friend Jimmy pitched me an idea for a reading comprehension web site for students. Jimmy is a teacher, and he found that the reading comprehension sites available for teachers contain bland stories that make both teachers and students dread doing reading comprehension. Thus, he told me he wanted to start his
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How Game Of Thrones Debunks Marriage
April 25, 2015
“Do you know what the realm is? It’s the thousand blades of Aegon’s enemies, a story we agree to tell each other over and over, until we forget that it’s a lie.” – Petyr Baelish HBO’s Game of Thrones has made Medieval Fantasy not just for huge nerds. It’s sexy, smart, and bloody as all
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Mother Ocean
April 19, 2015
I hit the snooze button on my alarm clock again. I wasn’t always this way. I used to not have to set an alarm. I used to wake up automatically at six in the morning, and I’d get out of bed to start my day. Back then, I couldn’t even understand why anyone used the
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