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Pointless Pitches
January 27, 2024
I’m full of really brilliant ideas as I’m a gifted writer who doesn’t just have dreams of seeing my name “written by” float across a movie screen, but screenplays to prove my skill and work. Not convinced? DM for a sample. I love to show off my work. Especially if you want to give me
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Paper Planes
January 19, 2024
Our purposeless lives are so fleeting, sometimes, I think of it like a paper plane. We’re this clean slate, and we’re folded and molded, for us lucky ones, by people who love us. And then you’re supposed to fly, gliding through the universe, some fragile thing. I was never good at making paper planes. And,
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Heckled On A First Date
January 6, 2024
I picked the place. A charming little craft beer and cocktail place on the Upper East Side. I’d never been but I have a knack for finding cool places to drink or dine, a combination of being a native New Yorker, using reviews, and knowing what I like. This was a first date. We had
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The Box
December 31, 2023
One day, I was staying at my sisters house out on Long Island where I frequently visit to hang with my awesome nephew and adorable niece and a box showed up at the front door. Of course, it’s not unusual for boxes to show up at any door, especially an Amazon box considering my sister’s
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Ode to Skinny Boy
December 29, 2023
My debut comedy album, “Weird Enough” is streaming on Sirius XM with special thanks to my funny friend, Lenny Marcus, and his record label, Skinny Boy Records. Lenny is the coolest giant nerd that I know. And, what even he may not remember, is how much Lenny was a fast friend and ally when I
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THINGS SANTA DIDN’T GET ME
December 26, 2023
Despite my repeated letters and being an absolute angel of a human (this is still under review, and being a “good” person is kind of a sliding scale anyway), I did NOT get the main things I wanted for Christmas. It’s like Santa might not even be real or something. Because the things I asked
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FOMS
December 16, 2023
We’ve all heard of FOMO (fear of missing out) unless you are a true hermit who avoids the internet and are probably a lot happier than the rest of us who scroll and yearn and create avatars of ourselves because the only thing we fear more than missing out on things is our true selves—
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Abandoned Places
December 10, 2023
My 2023 wall calendar (yes, I still keep one of those) was that of pictures of abandoned places, beautiful ones, like old buildings, churches, barn, ruins covered in colored leaves, accompanied by quotes of famous writers of the macabre like Edgar Allan Poe or Mary Shelley. What makes an abandoned place so attractive? Pictures of
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All I Want For Christmas Is… Tape?
December 1, 2023
I have always loved Christmas. I think people who hate Christmas probably just really hate their families. But I happen to love my exceptionally large (often too loud and out of their goddamn minds) family. Of course, as a kid, I loved the gift part too. But now, I actually prefer giving gifts to receiving
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The True Gateway Drug
November 27, 2023
Marijuana often gets a bad wrap as the “gateway” drug. Though, I think the stigma that people who try, or even smoke weed regularly, are going to turn into heroin addicts is pretty much an urban legend that’s fallen by the wayside. I would say that alcohol is truly the gateway drug. Booze was my
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